I went into action mode as soon as they told me they were coming home. I found a cardiologist and set up the appointment for Black Friday. While the rest of America would be out snagging the Christmas deals, we would be at the hospital, trying to figure out what was wrong. All the while I kept replaying in my head, “He has lived longer than his father. What if he is not here to see me graduate from college? What if he is not here to walk me down the aisle? What if his grandchildren never get to experience his personality? What if he doesn’t even make it home? How can this be happening?”
I had no way of knowing when we brought him in that morning, he wouldn’t be leaving anytime soon. He was admitted and tests and procedures were begun. My mother and I walked the halls of St. Johns. Waiting. When she wasn’t there to keep me company, I sang hymns trying to keep fear at bay; trusting in the One who holds me in His hands.